Hazel's Support

Another great cloud conversation I’ve had after Murray’s death was with my sister Hazel via email. Hazel and I shared a bedroom until she moved out of the house when I was 12. When I was returned home from the failed attempt to get Grandmother Ruthanne to cure my anorexia, it was Hazel who begged our mother to take me to a shrink. It worked. I have Hazel to thank for pushing me in the direction of the healers in the mental health care field.

My latest email to the family rambled on and on about which meds my doctor had switched me to, and how my group and individual therapy was going. I went on and on, even having my own made-up conversation with Grandmother Ruthanne at the end:

“Thanks for all the support. I'm really not trying to steal Murray's thunder in the needing-support department. I can just hear Grandmother Ruthanne saying, ‘Oh, she's just looking for attention’ like she did when I was anorexic. But you know what I have to say to that, ‘Gee, Grandmother Ruthanne, I wish you had the courage and strength and resources to have sought help for your own mental health issues during your lifetime. Then perhaps your progeny would all be better off.’"

Hazel’s reply was this: “I'm glad you have the courage to go after this, Sydney.”

Hazel has a poet’s way of voicing herself with beautiful brevity.